WHO ARE TRAILING SPOUSES?
Trailing spouse is the unflattering term given to expat spouses and partners who leave home and career to follow their partners around the world. This project focuses on the spouses and partners of U.S. Foreign Service Officers. The United States Foreign Service consists of 13,000+ professionals carrying out the foreign policy of the United States and aiding U.S. citizens abroad. They serve with their families at 265 U.S. diplomatic missions around the world. Up until the 1970s, the Foreign Service wife had official, yet unpaid duties. She was expected to go to receptions, participate in volunteering, and play gracious hostess for visiting delegations. Her performance was rated in her husband’s annual review. While life has changed for modern FS spouses (now both men and women), they live in a world heavily affected by their partners’ careers. These careers designate where the spouse lives, whether he or she will work, where their children will go to school and have countless effects on families’ health and wealth. Couple that with growing dangers and recent attacks on FS families in Cuba and China. One wonders whether this lifestyle is worth it. What draws spouses to a career that requires constant self-sacrifice? While the FS does offer paid, mainly administrative, positions within embassies for spouses, most spouses’ careers are quite constrained. They are restricted by security concerns, the availability of jobs in their field, work permit requirements, and a lack of understanding of the FS lifestyle in terms of career trajectory. In 2017, then secretary of state, Rex Tillerson, allegedly stated that the family member positions at U.S. embassies were a form of “corporate welfare” and instituted a 16-month hiring freeze. Many spouse jobs have been reinstated, but questions remain about the stability for families in the foreign service. This project follows the lives of spouses through an ongoing series of portraits and audio interviews. Foreign Service spouses live extraordinary lives and they have incredible stories to tell.
WHY AM I TELLING THIS STORY:
My husband joined the foreign service shortly before we married in 2009. I’ve spent the better part of a decade reinventing myself alongside my husband's career for better or worse in this lifestyle. We’ve served in Haiti, Zambia, Washington, Rwanda, Nepal, South Africa, and now Italy. The foreign service offers an amazing life of adventure and privilege, it also presents incredible challenges for the families of diplomats in a varying political climate. My life (and my career as a humanitarian photographer) is linked to my husband’s in ways that I have little control over. I often feel invisible and misunderstood with his big, public life alongside mine. I choose to tell the stories of spouses so that we can be seen, so we can share our experiences, and to give us power over our own narratives.
Abigail Hankin-Wei: Doctor, Teacher, Adovcate
“When I moved to Maputo, I saw myself mostly as a doctor. But I’ve gotten so much reward out of being a teacher and I’ve really grown as an educator in building the first emergency program in Maputo. I’ve had to learn a lot on how to be an advocate on behalf of the doctors I train.”
You might hear some unfamiliar terms commonly used by spouses in the Foreign Service in this interview. Click here for definitions.
Jade Hawes: Artist, Humanitarian, Foreign Service Kid
“I am a nomad, an artist, and an empathetic person. Moving to new countries every few years has shaped me, from childhood, into someone who is fascinated by what connects us all. That’s why I became a humanitarian and why I appreciate art that forces us to acknowledge what we have in common. ”
You might hear some unfamiliar terms commonly used by spouses in the Foreign Service in this interview. Click here for definitions.
Diana Argueta: Guatemalan, Animal Lover, Environmentalist
“I am Guatemalan with a passion to help animals. I’m a vegan. I found my calling in a tiny country in the Himalayas.”
You might hear some unfamiliar terms commonly used by spouses in the Foreign Service in this interview. Click here for definitions.
Álvaro José Castro Rivadeneira: Doctor, Biochemist, Academic
“I am a biochemist and medical doctor. I’m interested in science, politics, and history. I like to learn about the world, live in the world, and when possible, have a better impact in the world. ”
You might hear some unfamiliar terms commonly used by spouses in the Foreign Service in this interview. Click here for definitions.
Monique Kovacs Nathan: Networker, Communicator, Volunteer
“I’m a networker and communicator. I am always trying to help people find relationships that will be mutually beneficial. It gives me energy and enthusiasm. I’m creative and always designing or capturing a moment. I’ve come into my own in Nepal through volunteerism, friendships, and a community of creative types. I am holding sacred who I really am and learning to see myself as an individual separate from my husband and my children.”
You might hear some unfamiliar terms commonly used by spouses in the Foreign Service in this interview. Click here for definitions.
Julee Allen: Humanitarian, educator, singer
“ I’m a humanitarian. I’m a singer. I like to laugh. I have enormous respect for people who choose this life. I’ve met the most incredible patriots. People who deeply and profoundly love this country. And the spouses they bring with them are incredible patriots too.”
You might hear some unfamiliar terms commonly used by spouses in the Foreign Service in this interview. Click here for definitions.
Know a spouse with a story to tell? Nominate them for The Trailing Life!